Julia Dent Grant
by
Patricia Daniels
Oral Presentation to the United Daughters
of the Confederacy -- Lee County, FL
Chapter
December 2025Editor’s note: Ms. Daniels never
intended to have her written remarks for her oral presentation published.
Written for ease of delivery in the role of Mrs. Grant, I was never-the-less
able to convince her that Civil War enthusiasts would enjoy learning about her
research as much as the members of the group she delivered her remarks to. I am
indebted to her generosity and willingness to
share them with so many others.
-- Jack Bovee
My goodness! I am so
delighted that so many of you are here to hear about my beloved husband,
Ulysses S. Grant! (Ulys was his mother’s
first born. It would be six weeks before
she named Hiram Ulysses Grant, ‘Ulysses’ from the sly fox of Homer’s poem. Thomas L. Hamer was the Ohio congressman who would
give Ulys an appointment to West Point. Hamer wrote the War Department to
inform him of his choice but accidently named him Ulysses Simpson, using
his mother’s maiden name, Grant which was fine with Ulys. At West Point he was known as ‘Sam’.)
I am Julia Dent Grant.
I was born near St. Louis on my father’s 850-acre farm situated along
the Gravois Creek. It was the showplace
of the county.
I was the fifth of eight children and the first girl. My father, the Colonel, felt I could do no
wrong. My childhood was a “long summer
of sunshine, flowers and smiles.” As
were my sisters, I was given three servants of my own when I was born, and they
served me well for many years. Our
‘people’ were very happy, at least in Mamma’s time, though the young ones
became somewhat demoralized about the beginning of the Rebellion when all the
comforts of slavery passed away forever.
Neither my mamma nor my papa ever chided me as a child. I was happy, and I could do no wrong.
I was in school in St. Louis when Ulys began his weekly
calls to White Haven at the invitation of my oldest brother. My younger sister, Emily, was the first to
fall in love with him, and she followed him around like a puppy whenever he
came to visit with the other soldiers from the barracks. When Ulys and I met, his weekly visits became
daily.
My oldest brother, Fred, had been a roommate of Ulys’ at
West Point. Ulys was 16 when he matriculated---at
his father’s insistence---but was not particularly interested in academics,
other than mathematics, or his military appearance. He had always been his happiest with horses, and
was an exceptional and fearless rider. He spent his time with the horses at the
academy, and one of his jumping records was not broken for more than
twenty-five years! Upon his graduation
he had hoped to be assigned to the cavalry, but it was not to be. At that time, the best students were assigned
to the engineering corps, and the cavalry was the next most desirable
assignment. However, Ulys was assigned
to the infantry and then stationed at Jefferson Barracks, the largest military
base in the country at that time which was not far from our home.
My family was socially prominent and most hospitable to the
soldiers who were frequent to White Haven on Sunday afternoons. My brother Fred had encouraged Ulys to visit
as well, and though shy, Ulys did so.
When I arrived home from St. Louis and met him for the first time I
thought he was the nicest and most handsome young man I had ever met. We enjoyed each other from the first and
found common grounds in riding together in the early spring, fishing, and
drawing botanicals together. I was
delighted to learn that Ulys enjoyed romantic novels, as did I, and had read
many while at West Point. Some said
later that his ability to write clear orders for his armies’ officers and even
his own memoirs were a result of all his novel reading.
I was 18 at the time and he was 21. My father thought I was much too young for
marriage, and he wanted more for me than to be the wife of a soldier.
There was a great deal of concern in the political climate
of the day, and when Ulys learned his unit was to be relocated first to
Louisiana and then to Texas which had just been annexed into the United States.
He decided it was time to ask the Colonel for my hand in marriage.
It had been exceptionally rainy that spring and the creek
was overflowing and treacherous when Ulys attempted to cross it. He swam his horse through the flooded waters
and arrived at the piazza soaked through.
Mother found him some dry clothes, and we all waited together inside for
the outcome of the proposal. “No,”
announced the Colonel. “If you wanted to
marry Nellie, that would be fine, but not Julia”. Ulys stood firm though and said, “Only
Julia.”
Papa finally agreed to allow us to write to each other while
Ulys was gone. Later I asked Ulys why he
had forded the creek under such conditions.
He replied, “It is a superstition of mine that when I start a task, I
see that it is finished before turning back.”
I often thought of that remark during the Rebellion that was yet to come
and especially during the Overland Campaign in the East.
Ulys wrote often in the four years he was gone. He never approved of the war with Mexico
though he served with many of the officers in the war that he would meet again
during the War Between the States. There
were always two wars he felt should never have been fought. He always felt the United States was wrong to
invade a country so much smaller and so poorly equipped as was Mexico, and he
always felt the issue of slavery could have been resolved without war.
Ulys remained devoted and loyal during his absence and wrote
frequently of his love for me, often, he said, on drums captured from the
enemy. I, on the other hand, was not as faithful a correspondent, and he was
disappointed in that. I did and still do
have an eye condition known as strabismus that makes it difficult for me to
read or write for long periods. (The
condition could have been corrected later, but Ulys said “No.” He said he fell in love with me the way I
looked then and did not want that to change.)
After the defeat of Mexico and Ulys’ return, my father
finally consented to our marriage. I
will always remember fondly that hot, rainy evening in August of 1848. It was of necessity a simple wedding. We were married in my parent’s temporary
townhouse in St. Louis, filled with candlelight and the fragrance of my
favorite flowers, jessamine. My dress, a
gift of a dear friend was a beautiful white silk and a veil of beautiful white
tulle with flowers in my hair. Mrs.
Judge Shurls presented me with a lovely corsage bouquet of white cape jessamine
and a few more to fasten to my veil.
Papa’s hospitality provided a table at the end of the back
parlor upon which were served ices, fruits and all that good taste could
provide for the occasion. Three of the
officers at my wedding that evening would later surrender to Ulys at Appomattox
Court House including my cousin Pete Longstreet--who was Ulys’ best man. (Lt.
Cadmus Wilcox and Bernard Pratte were two of his groomsmen.) Ulysses’ parents would not attend. (They were strict abolitionists and
disapproved of the marriage.)
The day following our wedding we set out to visit relatives
and friends in Ohio. It was my first visit away from St. Louis and my first
trip on a boat. With Ulys it was like a
dream to me and always pleasant. I do
not remember a single other passenger on that trip!
Ulys’ first assignments were to Detroit and Sackett’s Harbor
in New York. Though my father wanted me
to remain at White Haven I was determined to be with Ulys. When Ulys was appointed quartermaster and
sent to the Pacific Coast, I was
pregnant with our second child and did return to White Haven. (Ulysses Grant, Jr. would be born in Ohio at
Ulys’ parents’ home and would be called “Buck” by all but me in honor of his
birthplace, the Buckeye State.)
Buck would be two when his father who had never seen him
finally returned from the West. Ulysses
had been lonely and had had several business setbacks while there. He was finally forced to resign from the army
or face a court-martial. It was his
friend, Simon Bolivar Buckner, from West Point and the Mexican War who would
loan him the money to return to White Haven.
Following several unsuccessful business ventures in St.
Louis, Ulys approached his father for a position in his leather goods store in
Galena, Illinois. We arrived in April of
1860 by riverboat and rented a small and comfortable home on High Street. There were now four children. The favorite, Jesse, named for Ulys’ father
played happily with his father each evening, (When Ulys returned home Jesse
would greet him at the door with, “You wanna fight Mister?” The two of them
would then tumble happily together on the floor. Ulys loved all his children deeply.) We joined the Methodist Church on Bench
Street. Though Ulys did not care for the
work in the store on Main Street he now could afford to feed and clothe his
family. He was always “very kind to me
when I was childish and unreasonable.”
My servants helped me with the cooking, the children and housekeeping. I was happy in Galena.
When Ft. Sumter fell to the Confederates, Galena held a
meeting. Ulys decided to go, and he
never stepped foot inside the leather goods store again. He offered his services to the army but was
ignored by George McClellan who was in charge of the Ohio command and refused
to see him. The Illinois’ governor
offered him the opportunity to train the unruly Illinois 21st
Volunteer Infantry in Springfield, which he did. He then made the volunteers march all the way
to Alton to join other volunteer groups rather than allow them to ride there by
train. Ulys was ordered to Missouri and
then on to Cairo.
The two most important men in my life were Ulys and my
father. My father was an avid supporter
of the South just as Ulys was an avid supporter of the North. I was torn by my love of both, but eventually
did what many women of the day did in choosing sides. My country was my husband’s country! Many of my childhood friends were most
surprised at my choice, and my father, though he would later live with us in
the White House, considered Ulys a traitor.
I joined Ulys in Cairo with the children and was so proud of
him when Ft. Donalson fell. It was the
first victory of the Rebellion for the North.
Ulys offered Simon Bolivar Buckner, his friend from West Point and the
friend who loaned him money to get home from New York after Ulys resigned from
the army, “No terms but immediate and unconditional surrender…” earning him the
name “Unconditional Surrender Grant.”
Following the victories of Forts Henry and Donelson came the
bloody battles of Shiloh/Pittsburgh Landing, Vicksburg, known at the Gibraltar
of the Confederacy, and then Chattanooga.
I stood with Ulys on the deck of his boat and held his hand as Admiral
Porter’s transports slid by the Confederate guns at Vicksburg at night. I stayed with him as often as I could
throughout the war. The officers were
pleased when I was in camp. Ulys was at
his best when I was near. Young Fred,
Ulysses, Jr, Jesse, and Nellie were often with me as well.
Many did not realize Ulys suffered from severe migraine
headaches during the war. I would nurse
him through these difficult periods with mustard plasters and footbaths, though
the morning of his meeting with General Robert E. Lee at Appomattox Court House
he would be suffering from one of the debilitating headaches, and I would not
be there.
When President Lincoln had called Ulys to Washington to make
him Commander of Chief of all the Union Armies, our son Fred accompanied him. Ulys had plenty of political and military
enemies, but the President was confident he had found his general. “I can’t spare this man,” he had said. “He fights.”
(Grant and Fred checked into the Willard Hotel. Grant, clothed in a nondescript battle worn
coat, was unrecognizable and was told only a small upper story room was
available. After Grant signed the
registration the hotel clerk was stunned and immediately found an elegant suite
for him and Fred. That evening they were
immediately recognized and received high praise by those in in the hotel dining
room who did know who they were.)
By the spring of 1864, Ulys had told the President that he
would command the armies from the field rather than from Washington, and he
appointed our dear friend, Cump Serman, to command the army in the West. Together they would win the war. Ulys’ war strategy, he would tell me, was
“exhaustion and annihilation.” He knew
he could replace men and supplies while General Lee could not.
Throughout the winter of 1864-65 and the spring of 1865, I
stayed with Ulys at City Point, Virgina, then the busiest port in the world,
bringing supplies to our troops. When
Lee’s starving troops finally tried to break out of the winter siege at
Petersburg, I knew Confederate defeat was near.
By telegraph Ulys informed me of Lee’s surrender at Appomattox Court
House and said he’d return late that evening, Mrs. Rawlins and I prepared a
celebration dinner for Ulys and his staff officers, but when they still hadn’t
arrived by 2 A.M. we went to our cabins.
When Ulys did arrive, he bounded up the stairs to my cabin to see me
first. We had a wonderful breakfast the
next morning with all who were there, and we all listened to General Sheridan’s
troops across the river as they raised shouts of jubilation and victory.
While I had been most anxious to see the defeated capital of
the Confederacy and did so, Ulys was not, and he never did step foot inside the
vanquished city. Almost immediately we
left for Washington to share in the celebrations there. When the President invited us to accompany
him and Mrs. Lincoln to Ford’s theater Ulys had as good as accepted. Mrs. Lincoln did not like Ulys and referred
to him as a “Butcher.”
I had no desire to spend another ghastly evening with Mrs.
Lincoln and told Ulys I was anxious to reunite with the children. In any case, I told Ulys that I refused to go
and that we must leave Washington city that night. Embarrassed, the General had to offer our
regrets to the President. I have always
thought since then if we had attended the theater that night, I might very well
have lost my beloved husband as well.
Ulys was elected twice to the presidency of the United
States, and I do think those were the happiest years of my life. I wept when he told me he had posted a letter
that he would not seek a third term.
With a sense of direction Ulys used money he had made from investing in
a Colorado silver mine to tour the world for two and a half years. Ulys was probably the most admired man on
earth.
Returning to live in New York City, Ulys invested his
savings in an investment firm, Grant and Ward.
Mr. Ward, however, used ours and other war veterans’ investments to
embellish his own lifestyle in what would later become known as a Ponzi
scheme. We were left penniless. Ulys had even borrowed money from William
Vanderbilt which was also lost. In return
Ulys gave him many of his most valuable war and travel mementoes with a promise
to repay every cent borrowed. It was a
very low time in our life.
Mark Twain was aware of Ulys’ circumstances and after
reading several of his war articles for Century Magazine convinced a reluctant
Ulys to publish his own memoirs. Ulys
had no choice. He had his family’s
support to consider. Though suffering he
worked faithfully on the manuscript and died of throat cancer only a few days
after he had finished it in July of 1885.
The book was sold by subscription.
It would earn more than $450,000 in royalties which would save the
family from its bankruptcy and allow us to live a worry-free and comfortable existence. (This amount would be approximately
$13-$14 million dollars today. Mark Twain
would almost later die penniless.) The
memoir’s is said to be the best piece of nonfiction writing and the most
popular book other than the Bible ever published in the United States. (It is still in print today.)
“Today I reside with my son Fred and his family in New York
City. I spend my days remembering my
wonderful life and my beloved husband, our pleasant evenings together reading
by the fire, our travels, our families and most of all hoping for the deepest
feeling of my and America’s most successful general. “Let us have peace,” he said. Ulys’ memoirs and the victory he won are his
greatest and most lasting legacy.”
“For nearly thirty-seven years, I his wife, rested and was
warmed in the sunlight of his loyal and great fame, and now, even though his
beautiful life has gone out, it is as when some far-off planet disappears from
the heavens; the light of his glorious fame still reaches out to me, falls upon
me, and warms me.”
_______________________
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